Personal Writing

A Strange Feeling

I woke up this morning with a strange feeling in my gut. I wasn’t sure if it was the food I had the night before, but when I looked out at the fields below my house, I realized that it was much bigger than that.

The fog was rolling across the open valley that I can see from my kitchen window. I stepped outside with the mundane intention of taking the trash cans down to the road because it’s trash day — but I was instead met with the awe-inspiring beauty of the morning. A strange feeling and a gentle reminder that the moon is still full, that the harvest is drawing to a close, and that it is still the season of letting go.

I don’t know what I have to let go of. Fear, probably. The fear that I’m not doing enough. The fear that the work I’m doing and the lack of income is hurting my family. The fear that my mom will get worse faster than we anticipated.

I need to let go of those fears, but I don’t know if I’m ready for that yet. I feel Her calling me to do so, but I need Her help and I need Her guidance.

The moon is full, and Brigit calls to me to accept the world around me for what it is. But she also calls to me to let me know that I can change it and that I am on the right path for myself, I just need to be patient.

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